Being playful

When did you laugh the last time, so much you had to brace yourself or started to cry? With all the atrocities that are going on in the world, we must not fall into despair or desperation, and succumb to this darkness, but fight it with light and good energy. To increase good energy, you can work on attaining a state of playfulness. A state of having fun!

So, if you find yourself stuck in a rut, or feeling a bit hopeless, make sure you do something that excites you. What does? Something that is about exploring with wonder, and brings forth your smile.

Here is a list of examples you can use:

  • Play with children
  • Go for an adventure outdoors
  • Watch a specific movie or TV-series (I love watching “Fawlty Towers” with John Cleese.)
  • Try something you haven’t done before
  • Do art, like finger-painting, or clay molding
  • Bake a cake and taste the batter
  • Start collecting figures, stamps or any other memorabilia you treasure
  • Share a mishap with someone who loves you
  • Turn up the volume of a favorite song, and sing and dance to it

What else can you think of? Schedule a time to have fun. Its reward is priceless and you will draw closer to Mother Earth.

Breathing

To get your spiritual practices right, you need to learn how to breathe accordingly. In Qigong, we inhale through the nose and exhale through the mouth, holding our tongue up the palate, leading our breath to fill our stomach. This is where our center is located, called Dantien. In Yoga, we both inhale and exhale through our nose, making a noise with our throat chakra. You can also do something called “fire breathing” where one rolls the stomach. Either way is used in Meditation, where your focus should be on your breath, to feel more present, letting thoughts come and go. Finding peace.

Our breath is what symbolises spirit, where the element of air, can be seen as both the carrier, and a metaphor, for spirit. In Hawaii, this is acknowledged through the greeting “Aloha”, which means that we affirm sharing breath, sharing life.

If you feel like your breathing is stuck in the chest, common with fears and stress, try breathing in tune with the ocean. Let your breathing be in the same rhythm as the rolling of waves, coming and going. Feeling one. Ha!

Making progress

In order to really feel positive change, we must feel it in our daily lives. While most of us long for pristine beaches, lush mountains, and only hearing birdsong outside our windows, going on a retreat will produce nothing. You probably even become more tired than rested, if you are led by the belief that you need to achieve something on your vacation. Besides, travelling somewhere should be about the destination, not a practice. A way to explore, discover and celebrate.

Telluselle Living Center is going to be designed like a spa, and be situated in a park close to the city; a site used for activities after work, that directly become integrated with your daily life. In fact, our sacred conversation circles are meant to be used as a sounding board for improving your relationships, increasing your creativity, and trying new ways of looking at life, as it is here and now. Trying, and then returning to the group with an experience to share, to see how it works. Lifecoaching, qigong, meditation, yoga and dancing are all too precious to not practice regularly. And the only way to incorporate any lessons we might have learned by listening to a lecture, gone to a workshop, or tried on a retreat, is to indeed do it, where we live. It’s also the only way we can measure our progress.

I hope you’ll join me.

What is a dialogue?

There is no better tool for peace and personal development than the dialogue. It builds on both parties entering it, show utmost respect and neutrality. It’s not about taking sides, or be right or wrong, but rather about hearing each other out, on equal grounds, with an approach that is genuine. In order for a dialogue to work, we must follow certain steps, to honor the process as intended:

  1. Set a place and time on neutral ground (ie not at home or either’s workplace)
  2. Decide on a topic or state the problem
  3. Explore the definition of the topic or problem
  4. Summarize
  5. Suggest solutions
  6. Find consensus, often a mix of solutions, or a third way, will arise
  7. Make a conclusion and preferably a decision

And later, we follow up with an evaluation, checking that action has been taken accordingly.

The dialogue thus, is more than a regular conversation. It’s the tool we use as Lifecoaches, usually for 45 min, which is an average proven time, that we are able to focus and be fully present – a must! You can see it as a good interview. When we offer a dialogue (a coaching session), the solemn purpose is to bring forth your own best strategies to reach a goal. It can also be used to create forgiveness.

Try it yourself!

Dealing with fears

Now, that we have a Russian invasion in Ukraine showing in the media all the time, it’s no wonder we become more fearful. Sweden isn’t a member of Nato and has had an aim to remain neutral, something that I grew up with, feeling proud of. It was the way of the UN, I thought. Now, however, we too could be targeted with an attack, for sending weapons to Ukraine and thereby taking sides, which I think is wrong by Sweden.

This fear is real. To handle fears, we must first discern what is real and what is created by our own worrisome mind. A direct fear, such as a physical threat, gives you both the chills, and a surge of energy, while worry wear you out. So, to deal with fears, let how you feel be known. Our fight or flee response, is our natural defence and something healthy to have. I have had to grow up dealing with this underlying current, due to the conditions of my childhood, with its family patterns and outer offenders, so I know first hand. To meet this fear, preparations are a must; to have our needs met, as well as have a source of information open. But most of all, to stay awake. To notice how people move around you, how the infrastructure works and how you can act in case of an emergency. This then, can become a safety cushion to fall back on. Something I too was taught growing up, thanks to my grandfather, who was a Firechief. And since this is real for many more than me, I finally feel better understood myself. So many people have misjudged my fears as anxious worry, when they have been actual threats to deal with. Stress is fear.

And remember, to instil fear, is also a weapon. To continue live our own lives with gratitude, is to choose the path to peace.

Setting a health goal

Something I have learned lately, is to consider my shape of the day, before rising to the occasion. Often when we aim to increase our vitality, or simply want to feel better, we tend to forget what our starting point is. To feel better, ie become more healthy, we must take this into account, that nothing is ever constant, change is. There simply is no way to always feel good. But we can find a good enough level.

To raise our wellness, is possible when we focus on getting our needs met, and learn to adapt these needs to our current state, whether we need an extra boost of this or that, to rest, or finding an opportune time to do something strenuous. What we really want, is to improve our shape of the day, so that we can live in optimum health, rather than aim for an achievement.

How do you feel? What is different yesterday from today, and what do you desire? What can you do today to restore your loss, or build something better? Which needs are more important to fulfil right now? What created this goal and how can you make sure you don’t fall back?

Book a session with your favorite lifecoach to feel better!

Dealing with media

First the pandemic, and now war in Ukraine. It might be difficult and scary to watch the news. And at the same time, we become warned about disinformation and how even former President Trump was blocked by Twitter. Who and what can we then trust?

Worth to remember, is that all media likes to present drama. They thrive on presenting a victim and an offender. And often by repetition and share, images grow to affect us into even a mass psychosis. Since I have both worked in, and studied, media, I can look at it a little more from the outside, and be less affected. And it’s the studying at a high university level, that enables me to combine my intellect with my heart, to see and understand what is unfolding, step by step.

So, my tip to deal with media, is to always look for direct sources. A direct source can for example be an interview, or a speech, coming directly from a close by observer. The analyses that follow are for the most part, bias by anchors or politicians wanting to further their careers, just as the image of the perpetrator is something he too wants to uphold, by notoriety. Having this in mind, allow you to develop a healthy critical mindset.

Look, but don’t be so moved. Be your best self, so you can be of best service. And solve your own conflicts.

What is self-care?

If you are interested in personal development and yoga, you probably have encountered the phrase “self-care”, but what is it really? Is it to do yoga every day and drink smoothies?

Self-care is about tuning into, and showing care, towards oneself. It’s to not be violent against oneself, as Lori Belilove, Isadora Duncan dance teacher, put it. It’s in how we do things. How we use our hands and our bodies, how we take the stand in a pose, being careful and gentle.

Self-care is about tending to our needs of anything from solitude and reflection, to socialising, sleeping and eating, exercising and spending time outdoors, and feeding our spiritual and intellectual curiosity with more knowledge. Part of tending to these needs, can be wellness practices, that we can use towards feeling better and become more productive at work or in our studies. But the wellness practice in itself, such as yoga, qigong and meditation, isn’t it. You need to also be able to love yourself, in order to exercise proper self-care. To give yourself tender loving care.

Healing modalities

In my quest to heal both physical symptoms and a grieving soul, I have tried several methods (besides counselling) to do so, since the mid 90’s. Here are more about my experiences:

Acupuncture felt like it did affect me so much that I just got more symptoms. However, Acupressure and its adjoining massage, helped me feel balanced and relaxed. Medical qigong activated my own self-healing. And Energymassage and Shiatsu continued it, refilling myself.

Deeksha have also been given me, but mostly with negative emerging feelings, whereas Shaktipat enabled me to do another shamanic journey to my subconscious and heal a childhood experience.

Reiki gave me some moments of warmth and releasing tears, but nothing that lasted. It felt similar to be prayed upon, with the laying of hands, which I have received in church.

Lomilomi massage felt like an extension of acupressure, with a participatory breathing work. This helped me feel realigned with my old self as a young adult, and has given me the best result.

Pranic healing felt light and uplifting, as a removal of clouds and more direct. A clearing.

Divine Diamond healing was something I tried in a group, where healing was channeled through meditation.

Naprapathy was an adjustment of posture, providing my body with more inner space to function better, while Rolfing, I thought was too rough, ie hurting.

At Telluselle Living Center, we’ll offer what is preferred by our customers, with a focus on Lomilomi, Pranic healing and Acupressure, while we also recognize that herbs and flower essences, such as Aromatherapy, can aid. These healing modalities don’t constitute any need of worship or require a specific faith, but aims to create wellness with a raised awareness of one’s body, mind and soul.

Am I culturally appropriating Hawaii?

I sincerely hope not. I will always remember a special moving feeling, when I watched Hula being danced in Waikiki, the first time in 2004, and realize that I can learn that. The answer to my yearning towards becoming more feminine, simply presented itself, together with my own passion. I have gone through this process together with Hawaiians, both when it comes to dancing Hawaiian Hula and practicing Ho’oponopono, and feel great sympathy with the exploitation by Hollywood.

In 2007, I received lots of criticism and negative reviews of my Hula, after posting videos of my own choreographies and having performed on Sweden’s Got Talent on TV4, for which I have apologized, and later learned more in Hawaii, to improve.

In 2018 or so, it was a group on Facebook expressing their concern about my Ho’oponopono. I have only learnt the real Hawaiian one, by reading Morrnah Simeona. And, I also have a conversation technique and organizational behavior education, that makes me eligible for coaching, in which Ho’oponopono can fit.

Therefore, I have installed certain measures to maintain the integrity of the islands. And myself! I don’t call myself, or assume the role of, Kumu, but a student, Haumana, referring to mine. I only share what I’ve learned there, and not for profit. And finally, my Dad has a PhD in Ethnography, so I have been brought up with a genuine respect for other cultures, for which I’m so grateful!

At Telluselle Living Center, I aim to only have instructors, who either are Native, or direct descendants of a Hawaiian Kumu, a student of. The same applies to the other practices, ie dances, yoga and qigong, which all have to been taught to the instructor, by reference to the US, West Africa, India and China.

I simply want to own a house, where I can be the hostess to all the wonderful practices that have helped heal me, including Lomilomi. And where I can lead conversation circles and coach others towards reaching their goals.

Practising Ho’oponopono

Whatever it is that you are going through, practising forgiveness can never go wrong. In Hawaii, there is a special prayer and approach to forgiveness. At best, one meet together with one’s adversary and stay in the meeting until everything is solved and settled. Second best, is praying and working on oneself.

Start by acknowledging what has become a conflict and see if you can relate to what your accuser is saying. Have you ever felt like him or her in another situation? You probably have, thus you can practice forgiveness on that. This in turn opens up for compassion and understanding with a greater acceptance and respect to follow. Visualise ocean green light clearing the situation after this prayer, that is said with pure intention.

Divine Creator, Father, Mother, Child as One,

If I, (insert name) , or any of my family, relatives, or ancestors, have ever insulted you (insert name), your family, relatives or ancestors, now or in the past, I humbly ask for forgiveness. Let this be so and let this be light. Thank you.

Then when everything is vented and solved, we share a meal and move on.

More about the woman behind it, can be read here.

Finding a role-model

“It has taken me years of struggle, hard work and research to learn to make one simple gesture, and I know enough about the art of writing to realize that it would take as many years of concentrated effort to write one simple, beautiful sentence.” (Isadora Duncan)

Isadora Duncan keeps being a source of inspiration for my growth. And what a joy it brings me both for my dance and writings! Through learning her motions, I get to experience a sense of freedom and a sense of space to improve. To look at every detail, every angle, every direction, every part of my body and how I can place them differently, emphasising or hiding, expressing passionately or being coy. She in turn, looked to the Greek mythology, for example.

When I started taking classes in this style, in Stockholm, Sweden 2014, I used to do an hour of yoga first as a warm-up. This helped me being more warmed up, as well as being grounded and better in balance. This, however, doesn’t mean that all yoga practitioners have to dance, and on their mats!

Move your heart first, and let your body follow.

Hawaiian health-tip!

There are a plethora of natural supplements out there, claiming to do wonders. Which one really do work? This is when our mouth-to-mouth sharing is so important, besides our own trials. Here are my best tips:

What has really helped me to heal my stomach and skin problems, is this Aloe Vera Gel that I took a shot of each morning. Some years later, I have tried Noni-juice to boost my immune system, which it really did. It realigned me and made me feel more upbeat. I was introduced to this when I lived in Honolulu and got to see how the fruit was fermented in the sun.

Besides these, I can also recommend to drink Pomegranate juice, and take a daily vitamin with easy to absorb iron, like Blutsaft. And Lemon-Ginger tea with honey for breakfast!

What is working against Covid-19?

When the Covid-19 outbreak began 2020, I was living in the Lisboa area in Portugal. The measures there were quite drastic: All stores closed but for groceries and pharmacies. A limited number of people got to enter, all used sanitizers, and lines were kept in order by the police, who also made checkpoints between villages. They even put plastic foil on card-readers. Everybody wore masks and avoided commuting. As of today, Portugal got 19 000 deaths and 1.5 million cases.

Now in 2022, I am in Sweden. I got tested several times, have no symptoms, and all came back negative. I got three vaccine shots and watch the society pretty much function without any visible restrictions. And since nobody, or only few, are wearing masks, should I? Sweden got 15 000 deaths and 1.4 million cases. Both Sweden and Portugal have a little more than 10 million inhabitants.

So, what is working against this virus? Is it even something we need to learn to live with, like others? At the bottom of this crisis, lies the question of travel and import/export. What is necessary and what can stop? People need to be allowed to go and live where they have their optimum health, their optimum life, then there would be less need of transportation, both for goods and people.

Can I move please?

Photo from an old cable car in Portugal.

AUM

Both when I started taking classes in Qigong, and in Yoga, in Sweden, they were practices to music. To me, it aided my learning of the routines, since it became like learning a dance choreography. However, traditionally, there is no music, but just a focus with a mantra or simply a pattern of breathing.

We all get affected by music, and the question is how. So, to be able to really practice mindful presence, it becomes easier and more correct without. It also serves a different purpose without music. Yoga can then be both used for warm-up and winding down after a stressful day.

The same applies with lit candles, that I have often seen together with yoga practices. That seems to resemble a church and an altar, which then takes away the focus on physicality.

At Telluselle Living Center, we will only focus on our own inner journeying, and practice presence, with the help of symbolism found in nature for our asanas. More about the sacred sound of “Aum” here.

Photo from Hawaii 2010.

Made of bamboo

I used to have a wind chime made of bamboo, that sounded really nice. And when I lived in Honolulu, HI in 2010, I was introduced to David Sands, architect for Bamboo Living (see photo), who has made pre-fabricated houses that one can set up almost everywhere. I went to one of their showings and have of course also seen bamboo grow in Manoa.

Bamboo is a renewable source, that therethrough is eco-friendly. While bamboo function as wood, it’s actually a form of grass. Therefore, I see it as something we can build Telluselle Living Center with, including double walls for isolation that is possible. There are also floors and furniture made of bamboo, that we can use as decorating elements.

After I had returned to Sweden, I came up with another idea in 2014, to also use bamboo to make a lei; ie a Hawaiian flower garland, that I aim to sell worldwide.

It’s very hard to break a bamboo rod, so from a spiritual point of view, it can symbolise being the spine of the matter. To be unbreakable. To be a channel for the Great Spirit.

Dancing with the natural elements

The only way to escape the power of nature, is to become like the element. I believe that the fear of these powers, is what created the beliefs in making them godly. Each element became a god. What we nowadays can do, is be inspired to see the natural forces flow and interact for us to become better in balance. Both Hawaiian, Native American and Chinese Medicine takes this into account. I like to use the natural elements as symbols of this holistic view:

Fire – Heart (passion) – East

Air – Spirit (peace) – North

Water – Soul (purpose) – Center

Earth – Body (prevention) – South

Metal – Mind (power) – West

Each element affects another in an endless dynamics, just like life. And becomes a medicine wheel.

Around the table

At Telluselle Living Center, we will host small groups for sacred conversations, in a coaching manner.

We start by having decided a topic beforehand to focus on. Everyone participating, honors a sense of confidentiality, ie that we respect each other’s honesty and vulnerability that comes with authentic sharing, letting it stay within the group.

I, or other certified coach, will lead the discussion, but not teach.

Then, we let the word travel around the table, for each person in the circle to have his or her say about the topic. This require us to be attentive and practice neutral listening, which in turn becomes mindful presence. It’s important to not sit and only rehearse what to say, when it becomes your turn, but to let the persons before you grow the topic. At best, our conclusion will then become the result of this synergy, that developed naturally during the course of our conversation.

Ready to try? Contact me!

Choosing gemstones

In Feng Shui, it’s common to use gemstones as part of interior decorating, to lift and create more flow of energy in the room. Each stone is holding a certain frequency that we match with our emotional charge, representing a certain quality. I used to work over the summer in a store selling self-help books and gemstones 20 years ago, where I learned the various types and to help match it with customers. Often I can sense a subtle pulse, by holding it in my hand. It’s how I came to feel the life of Mother Earth, all condensed into little rocks! To choose which one is for you, is just a matter of your own taste and perhaps matching a desired charge, you’d like to be reminded of and attracting. Rose quartz for example, is good for love, while Mountain crystal raises the overall vibration in a room. Here, I’m wearing Citrine, that is a self-cleansing stone and therefor a good filter against unwanted energy. Otherwise, to clean your stones, use seasalt, or put them in soil for a week or so. Then let them be refilled in the sun.

Each stone holds the energy from where it came. What we refer to as gemstones, simply hold it a little bit more.

Rest in Mother Earth’s embrace

While we now have a new year, a new chapter, we can begin, it can also be of comfort to remember that it’s all man-made. In China, New Years is celebrated in February and in the Arabic countries, it’s celebrated at the time of the Spring Equinox. Life goes on, regardless.

Religion is how we in society try to gather around a set of rules to live by, in harmony, so also with the calendar. But, we can also look to Mother Earth as our rock, our grounding anchor, with her seasons and her stability. The forces that govern our nature, was here before you, and will continue after you. In this lies an opportunity for reverence and respect, as well as detachment from religion. The environment, and our collective need for resources and a good climate to live in, thus is what can bring us oneness. We can all focus on the environment, and thus set our goals accordingly, as a whole. All with a foundation of relating to Her as a living entity.

More about my personal journey to heal with Mother Earth, can be found in my book “The Call for Divine Mothering” and on my webpage at telluselle.com. Photo from 2010 by Desirée Seitz.