Tag: healing

Using affirmations

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For a dancer, a mirror is a must. We use them in our studios, to see that we do the motions correctly. For most people though, mirrors are often a way to find examples of your looks to complain about. The woman who tried to change all this, was called Louise Hay, and she invented something called “mirror-work” as well as affirmations. Mirror-work, is to be able to stand in front of a mirror and express that you love yourself fully and honestly. In order to get there, you can use affirmations.

Affirmations are positive statements, that you say in present tense, as if they were true already, such as: I’m beautiful. I’m worthy. I’m courageous. In the beginning, when I started using Louise Hay’s affirmations, as well as wrote my own, in the mid-90’s, I often felt like they weren’t working at all. Instead, I felt that my emotions regarding the topic, came to the surface more, whether doubt, sadness or anger. This however, enabled me to feel this emotion more fully, and delve into the cause of it. It could be something someone had said to me in a belittling way, or something else I had experienced. Some days, it was simply a lack of self-esteem. Finding faith and working through these emotions, by forgiving and reframing the incidents and conflicts from a more adult perspective, has then made it possible for me to actually feel, for example, both beautiful, worthy and courageous.

Have you ever tried using affirmations? What would you like to feel about yourself and be? How do you feel right now saying them? Why do you feel the opposite? Who and what can you forgive, including yourself?

Happy New Year! – Happy New You!

Finding forgiveness

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Forgiveness works in three ways and all three must be considered, to complete the circle and be able to truly let go and move on. Here are the three ways:

Self-forgiveness: Forgiving yourself, can sometimes be harder than another person. It’s also more necessary, since you still have to live with yourself and be able to continue forward. So, try to locate within, where your offense is stemming from and why. Then, practice self-compassion. If you did your best, you can’t expect yourself to do more, until you learn more, and have the space to change.

Forgiving others: We all need to receive an apology from time to time, and it might be the hardest thing to ask for one. However, holding a grudge will certainly affect your relationship regardless of its nature, wherefore this is necessary. Simply, share how you feel. A good way to find forgiveness in terms of what others have done to you, is by putting yourself in their shoes for a minute. What have they, or are they, going through? What are their needs? What did you do to provoke the situation yourself? Also here, practice compassion.

Offering an apology yourself: Owning your own behaviour and communication, feels much more empowering than not. Try it! Look into what your motive and shape of the day was. Have you not slept enough or eaten, when you had an argument? Did you believe something negative and expecting that, or assuming something unfounded? Find compassion for both yourself and the other.

The way to forgive, can be done by relating one’s own behaviour with another’s. Let’s say that someone shows envy of you and you feel offended, since you worked really hard to get what you wanted. Instead of merely defending yourself, you can try another approach. Can you find another time, with the same person, or someone else completely, where you, yourself, have felt envious? Then, you can relate to that feeling. To heal this, offer an apology to that person, whether literally or through a prayer. This way, you can heal both backwards and forwards, including within your lineage as you set out to also include your ancestors and children and offer forgiveness also on behalf of them. This is the way of Ho’oponopono – the Hawaiian forgiveness process and prayer. When you take responsibility for your own behaviour, that you have showed in the past, you heal the future.

Healing our inner child

Hannah TelluselleLeave a comment

For many years, I’ve been on the path of healing my inner child. What does this mean, and how does this apply to you? According to the psychology theory called Transaction Analysis, we tend to take a role of either being as a parent, being as an adult, or being as a child, when we communicate and relate to others. This is true across the board, both professionally and personally. Thus, this is also how we can get stuck in relationship patterns, creating the same type of dramas and dynamic, over and over. I wanted to break free from mine, which often was assuming a parental role towards others, and decided to do so, after my mother had passed away, in 2004. It’s also said in the Bible, that we should be like little children, to be able to enter heaven. Alas, this path has become also about finding faith and living by it.

Healing our inner child, simply means to reclaim and reconnect with our childlike essence and spirit within, and let him or her shine through us. We do this, by tending to our needs, by making our bodies and our homes, a safe and nurturing place to live in, and by setting appropriate boundaries for ourselves, that we enforce. A healthy inner child exuberates joy, curiosity, enthusiasm with a strong will to explore the world. It also thrives on living our passion and meeting with others that feed our inspiration and support us to do so, with a sense of being playful. Most of all, healing our inner child is about becoming our own best parent to ourselves. After doing so, I believe, we also will have healthier relationships to others that will ripple into society, also becoming more empowered and healthy.

More about my journey can be found in my books, with the third one on its way!